X-Tra Rant

This IM thread with CJ is too good not to share with the world.

me: God.. the Celtics are 5-8 and leading the Atlantic division.
CJ: Seriously? I’ve not been following the NBA that closely. That’s just freaking terrible.
me: get this… as much as we complain about the pacers…. 11 of 15 teams in teh East are at least 2 games under 500 and the pacers are 8-7.
me: god damn that is scary.
CJ: Damn, I had no idea the East was *that* terrible.
me: The Pacers are FOURTH in the Eastern Conference. FOURTH. at 8-7. Leading the way? Orlando at 11-4. My God. That’s atrooooooooocious.
me: http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/standings
CJ: See, my prediction of us getting the 7 seed was based on the assumption that there were some minimally competent teams in the East. Guess I assumed too much.
me: yeah.. the Pacers could have home court in teh first round at this rate.
CJ: If the Pacers get home court in the first round, the East should just fold up shop and start over.
CJ: They’re like the NFC, lol.
me: or get replaced by the ACC. heh
CJ: Oh yeah… We need the European system! In football ‘m quite sure OSU is ready for promotion. They’re at least the second best pro football team in Ohio, and possibly better than that given how often Cincy’s defense goes in the tank.
me: and most big tiem college players are already getting paid….
CJ: Maybe we should promote OSU and USC, and thus relegate Detroit and Oakland.
CJ: Heck, Oakland might be able to have a winning record in the Pac-10.
me: heh sounds like a perfect solution to me. and USC would finally give the NFL that long desired LA franchise.
CJ: Oh, that’s right! Call the commissioner!
me: Of course Detroit in teh Big 10 would just be more competition with Northwest and IU for that coveted #8 spot in the league.
CJ: True, they get a bit of a bad draw there.
me: Maybe promote… Miami Ohio or Marshall to the Big 10 and stick the Lions in the MAC. That woudl be more fair. and regionally it works. heh
CJ: I’m looking at the NBA now.. Chicago, how the hell do you improve your overall roster and get worse? Amazing.
me: you tell Ben Wallace it’s against team rules to wear a headband, in teh process pissing him off and not making him want to work to earn that fat contract.
CJ: Oh, good idea. The Lions would actually have a shot a winning the MAC, thus giving football fans in Detroit something to do besides egg Matt Millen’s house.
me: exactly! and with the MAC beign such a QB friendly conference, mayeb all those WRs can pan out.
me: This needs to happen.
CJ: I would like to point out that every team in the Western conference other than Memphis would be leading the Atlantic division right now.
me: at least we get to watch Isiah Thomas flame out spectacularly.
CJ: Heh, what writer was it who was claiming that NY would surprise people this year?
me: Where next for poor Isiah? NBDL? Would it be possible for him to not screw up a developmental team? Maybe he can get a team full of 12 year old point guards for his NBDL team. Talk about their upside and how it’s his team and now he can coach it.
CJ: The problem with my all-combo-guard strategy is that it just hasn’t been tried enough!
me: someone needs to get Matt Millen and Isiah Thomas together. Mayb eput them in charge of a baseball team - they’ve already fucked up an NFL team and an NBA team between them.
CJ: Oh God. They’d make the Pirates look like a well run organization.
CJ: They’d somehow find a way to lose 120 games or more, just watch.
me: They would put together a team made up entirely of utility infielders and middle relievers.
me: and somehow outspend the Yankees.
CJ: Oh, of course. Isaiah would need to lock in as many past-their-prime prima donnas to long term high dollar contracts as possible. And with no salary cap, he’d have even more room to blow money!
me: I know!! A TV show for The Ocho - The Millen/Thomas Group. Millen and Thomas build fictional fantasy teams and then rationalize them. Allow them to play their teams on video game consoles. I’m telling you… it would be a hit.
CJ: rofl.. I would totally watch this.
CJ: Matt Millen keeps trying to run seven wide and wonder why he keeps getting called for illegal formation and ineligible man downfield…..
me: Isaiah Thomas running 5 PG lineups and watching other teams set rebounding records.
me: they both complain when the MLB simulation won’t let them start two pitchers at once.
CJ: He’d of course wind up with 5 selfish point guards who don’t really like to pass.
CJ: They’d fight to see who could bring the ball up. It would be awesome.
me: a spinoff - PG Cage Match. Put PGs, handpicked by Isiah Thomas, into a steel cage with one basketball. 5 men enter, one man leaves.
CJ: lol
me: Jamal Tinsley tags out only to see Stephen Jackson enter with a loaded machine gun. Stephon Marbury is too busy tossing cheap shoes over the cage to the front row and doesn’t know what hits him.
me: hell just call it NBA Cage Match.
me: Poor Adam Morrison huddled in the corner in the fetal position, muttering “There’s no place like spokane. There’s no place like Spokane.”
CJ: This would so totally rule. We need TO’s Wide Reciever Showdown as well.
me: heh there are so many options. We really need to be put in charge of The Ocho. Get Jamie, Matt and Mike in on running the network.

This is how my brain works.