Pro-life advocates celebrated approval of the new anti-abortion drug UR-86 by the Food and Drug Administration Tuesday, calling it a "safe and effective method" for terminating pregnant women while leaving their unborn children unharmed.
Tuesday night, South Dakota legislators introduced a bill to impose a five-day waiting period for teenage girls and women before they can buy the pill, claiming its use does not adequately safeguard the lifestyle of the father, the laundry of the father, or the favorite meals of the father. The legislators cited Pfizer's own published list of side effects of UR-86, which include domestic messiness, already-born-child neglect, and inadequate stocking of the fridge.
I *heart* The Onion
The Gospel is here! Put on your pirate garb and head to your local bookstore for The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
I'm going to pick up my copy this afternoon. May you be touched by his noodly appendage.
I'm going to rip this off wholesale from CJ because it's too damn funny not to post.
10. Lock Me in the Kitchen, Please by Phyllis Schlafly
9. I’m OK, You’re a Welfare Queen by Ronald Reagan
8. Rape Me, Robber Barons! by Ayn Rand
7. How to Talk Nicely and Subjugate People by Leo Strauss
6. This Used to be a Free Country, Back When Women Couldn’t Own Property and Lynching Was Socially Acceptable — a Heritage Foundation Report
5. Hey, Maybe There Is Such a Thing as a Free Lunch by Arthur Laffer
4. Jesus Loves You, That’s Why He Would Rather You Have More Children Than You Can Afford and Die of AIDS Than Practice Safe Recreational Sex by Pope John Paul II
3. Jesus Hates the Sinner, Hates the Sin, and Loves Tax Cuts for Millionaires by Pat Robertson
2. Vietnam: We Would Have Gotten Away With It, If It Weren’t For Those Meddling Hippie Kids by Oliver North
1. War… It’s FAN-tastic: Dissertations on Foreign Policy and Military Strategy by a Bunch of Ass-Monkeys Who Have Never Served in the Military Nor Seriously Studied the Subject edited by Jonah Goldberg